For many years I’ve tried hard
to be like I thought others wanted me to be
so that I could feel loved by them.
It didn’t work. It was painfull. I felt lonely.
Then, for many years, I’ve tried hard
to be like I thought I wanted myself to be
so that I could feel loved by myself.
Again it didn’t work. It was painful. I felt lonely.
Out of desperation, I stopped trying
and gave myself permission to just be,
opening to life and embracing all the pain,
all the loneliness, all the unmet needs.
In that opening
all the LOVE and CONNECTION I was longing for